Funny Quotes

There is nothing more foolish than a foolish laugh. Risu inepto res ineptior nulla est

What a desolate place would be a world without flowers. It would be a face without a smile; a feast without a welcome. Are not flowers the stars of the earth? Are not our stars the flowers of heaven?

The amount of energy spent laughing at a joke should be directly proportional to the hierarchical status of the joke teller.

Earth laughs in flowers . . .

When next you are worried or angry, force yourself to turn up the corners of your mouth and smile-and you will find the value of this tip.

But why doesn't the Gospel ever say that Christ laughed?" I asked, for no good reason. "Is Jorge right?" "Legions of scholars have wondered whether Christ laughed. The question doesn't interest me much. I believe he never laughed, because, omniscient as the son of God had to be, he knew how we Christians would behave. . . ."

The most wasted of all days is that in which we have not laughed.

Of all days, the day on which one has not laughed is the one most surely wasted.

You hear that boy laughing?—you think he's all fun; But the angels laugh, too, at the good he has done; The children laugh loud as they troop to his call, And the poor man that knows him laughs loudest of all.

For these [difficulties] I have found that a smile and a stick will carry you through all right, and in ninety-nine cases out of a hundred it is the smile that does the trick.

A smile starts on the lips, A grin spreads to the eyes, A chuckle comes from the belly; But a good laugh bursts forth from the soul, Overflows, and bubbles all around.

I would like to thank the press from the heart of my bottom.

I’ve had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn’t it.

They’re lawyers. That’s Latin for liars!

Fun and failure both start out the same way.

If the people of New Zealand want to be a part of our world, I believe they should hop off their islands and push them closer.