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Basically my wife was immature. I'd be at home in the bath and she would come in and sink my boats.

I don't want to achieve immortality through my work. I want to achieve it through not dying.

A Bay Area Bisexual told me I didn't quite coincide with either of her desires.

What if everything is an illusion and nothing exists? In that case, I definitely overpaid for my carpet.

When you get through all the phony tinsel of Hollywood, you find the genuine tinsel underneath.

Circumstances may cause interruptions and delays, but never lose sight of your goal. Prepare yourself in every way you can by increasing your knowledge and adding to your experience, so that you can make the most of opportunity when it occurs.

If I've learned anything in the past quarter century, it is that we cannot federalize virtue.

Ninety percent of success is showing up.

Perfection consists not in doing extraordinary things, but in doing ordinary things extraordinarily well.

To whom much is given, much is required.

The gods only laugh when people ask them for money.